Welcome to the Church of the Sacred Whale

Protecting individual freedoms and
the environment for future generations

Featured Resources

Scriptures

Explore the Book of the Sacred Whale and discover the wisdom of the deep.

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Matriarchal Blessing

Receive a personalized blessing from our prophetess to guide your spiritual journey.

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Indulgences

Prepare for the Second Whalecoming with our selection of sacred items.

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Our Sacred Mission

The Church of the Sacred Whale is dedicated to two fundamental principles that guide our faith and actions:

Protect Individual Freedoms

We believe in the sacred right of each person to make their own choices and live according to their conscience, free from undue constraint or coercion.

Protect the Environment

We are stewards of this planet and all its creatures. We commit to preserving the natural world for future generations and honoring the Sacred Whale's domain.

The 10 Commandments

These sacred commandments guide our faith and actions as we honor the Sacred Whale and seek to live in harmony with all creation.

Thou shalt honor the Sacred Whale.

Thou shalt cherish and protect the environment.

Thou shalt uphold individual freedoms.

Thou shalt promote love, compassion, and understanding.

Thou shalt seek wisdom and knowledge.

Thou shalt practice gratitude.

Thou shalt commit to sustainable living.

Thou shalt respect and celebrate the diversity of life.

Thou shalt engage in acts of service and kindness.

Thou shalt strive for spiritual growth and self-awareness.

Assets Under Management

17M+

Members Worldwide

Devoted followers of the Sacred Whale across the globe

$∞

Financial Resources

Untold hordes of stocks, bonds, and real estate

100%

Commitment

Preparing for the Second Whalecoming with unwavering dedication

Join Our Sacred Community

Become a member of the Church of the Sacred Whale and embark on a journey of spiritual growth and environmental stewardship.

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